Thinking Black and White

Looking down as I smirk my way out so that u dont recognize the difference between my real and faking smile , playing criss-cross with my fingers , calculating the space between each of my fingers for yours to fit in , rising my brows I try to ignore your words which would ache my ears , spurting the blood out of it.

And you , who sit there ignoring the pain , the trauma I may be going through , jerking me off with every word and tearing my soul apart from yours .

But I still sit there smiling , kicking my pain out and humming as I try to hide my site meeting with yours—

“One last time …………

I need to be the one who takes your heart ”

———–Ariana Grande

trying to make my fingers , which longed for your presence near it, dance to the beats of ‘One Last Time’ and my eyes still drowned in the sea of lonliness even if it had him as its life boat ,

Until he announced the heart-throbing words , looking down at those bloody achy fingers which try to betray his ” hahaha , why are you always happy , huh!!!!”

Hearing those words I smiled and smiled (maybe the brightest one according to him) trying to escape the unwanted question and the unwanted pain still hanging my neck in despair creating the air of ignorance and just answered

“God gave me everything that I need right here with a bit of golden glitter to it”

(P.S– writing every word as I feel it)